Ice Cream

The preeminent scientist runs outside

Outside sounds like a Depeche Mode song

But it is nothing more than choir boys exploding overhead

Everyone is dead

She tries to ask a cop for help

But he is dead

She tries to ask the ice cream man for help

Telepathically he replies the Choco Tacos are $2.50

But he is dead

She steals one and ignores his telepathic complaints

‘I am out of control. I hate my shower curtains’ she thinks to herself

In her apartment she turns on the TV

The newsman says

‘Everyone is dead

The time has come to tear down Paradise and put up a parking lot’

An unknowable force crushes the preeminent scientist

She sees herself in post-apocalyptic Sesame Street

Elmo has been sodomized and is thrown into a fire to keep the other Muppets warm

‘This must be heaven’ she thinks to herself

As Elmo screams in agony she thinks about her life

Thinks about all the things she’s done for a Klondike Bar

She regrets nothing

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